i looked back at the posts i made this year and it seemed that little by little, my blogging interest has dwindled down. no, i am not in love with someone else nor i am enjoying work. i just feel lost and that i do not know where to start or how to start to get back on track. well, i think i might have just flunked one subject for not completing the requirements while i am still in danger for another three more courses. tsk tsk tsk.
weight is up and so my voracious appetite. is it stress? probably. is it work? partly. work which somehow consumes 80% percent of my days for the week has somehow become me. i have become what i work for. in the process of making a living, i lost myself and now, i am in downward spiral of binge eating, self-loathing of unfinished tasks but in a weakening resolve to change.
i think i am drowning- in fear, in laziness and in aimless efforts to better my life. friends? they seem to have lost me. or is it the other way around? my original nursing unit is now in danger of becoming a memory. and that, all ties that bound the staff are starting to weaken.
my hope is still burning. and it will continue to burn. for now, i will try to uplift this bothered soul by pictures of life and love.