I was whining few days ago about how hopeless my situation as a nurse or a college graduate; but here now, I am perplexed of which way to go.
Today, I was not thinking about being choice-less with my life as I have resolved to myself that it will come. My patience has somehow turned into a see-saw pattern that sometimes, I lose it but other times, it overshadows my anxiety.
I have talked to a friend who is waiting for her student visa in Australia. She'll go to a university and study again taking up a business course (FYI: She just passed the Nurses' Licensure Examination last December 2007). I asked her about the process of applying for the visa and she promised that she will mail the details to me once she gets her visa. Now, it seems that my parents are willing to spend a lot of money so I can go to Australia and start my career there. It seems logical for them that with this choice, I am able to bring my family there in no time. Besides, they are really in love with the country as both have been there for quite some time. For me, this is a tempting choice.
Another option for me is to take the NCLEX examination. The American Dream is still alluring for a lot of Filipinos just like me but the things is, the environment and the situation of the US has been unhealthy for a lot of people. With me, I can take the exam but I am just not sure if I am really that prepared. I have been reading books and listening to mp3 lectures as I also answer practice questions. Results of the practice questions are pretty decent and deep inside of me; I feel that I can make it with proper concentration. So tomorrow, I am in search for review centers. The only problem that I see here is that it may conflict with another option that I have- the employment in Egypt.
For five months now, I have been waiting for my working visa to be issued and until now, it has not been granted. Another batch of nurses are to be deployed this August 5 and the office assured us that we will surely be deployed ( by late August according to them) as well since they will be interviewing another batches of nurses for work. So there, three of us are left behind here in the Philippines. Question is when will this visa be released? I may waste a lot of time again by waiting for it and yet, I am hesitant to engage in another endeavor.
Time and again, my fear for making decisions has constantly played a part in me. I am about to make a decision for which it will surely change my life. Honestly, I am afraid of making a mistake or to say the least, making a decision. I know I must face this or I'll perish (figuratively and literally).
God certainly has a sense of humor. From being choice-less to perplexed with what to choose.