No More Pata Tim

while i was eating pata tim with "some" servings of steamed rose, chef rosebud and rich herrera were cooking cod with papaya sauce on the tv.

cool isn't it? i was eating chunks of fat and a lot of carbohydrates while the two celebrities were eating the healthy stuff. seriously, my life needs change. drastic changes.

these thoughts were actually stimulated by nam's comment that i have so much baggage. knowing that what he said is true inside and out (belly included), i thought i really need a change. yes change for the nth time.

the capacity to change is affected by a lot of variables. i can name some which, undoubtedly, delivered their significance in my life. when i said significance, it is not exclusive to being a good thing. a lot them actually are negative in their own nature as i have yet to fully touch them.

desire, time, effort and money. all these have come to take their parts in my pursuit towards change. desire was always with me. when things get rough, desire comes to me and reminds me that a change is needed and to make it come true, i have to stick with her. desire holds my heart so close that i envision myself always in a new environment where change is happening.

time? i have all the time in the world. how about for effort? there is some i guess but until money does not come around, my efforts will be very vague to see. so the solution? a job. i really need a job so i can have the money to mobilize my desire to efforts with the time given to me.

take for example, my weight issue. i have been overweight since puberty hit me. a lot of factors to be considered in this one. my mom's unconscious way of kapampangan cooking plus the unavailable facilities for getting active. growing up, i was discouraged not to be active in sports as it will be bad for my studies so now, i am that person nearing obesity. the desire and effort is there. dying with the diseases my patients had really makes me go radically clean in living. i read a lot of magazines and books about fitness. i walk everyday for more than an hour and sometimes run if my body permits to. i do some exercises when i wake up.

but until i can hit the gym and prepare my food on my own, my dream of a rich herrera-body will be far from reality. don't forget, i need to have a job first.

i guess need to exchange my pata tim for now.